Robin and Merin Yoshida
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When a medical mix-up almost killed 14-year-old Mika Yoshida,
death became a reality for her mother, Robin, and her younger sister,
Merin. During the three years that Mika was ill, it seemed to her
family that the doctors didn’t really care. At 11, Merin decided, “I
can do this, and I can do it better.”
Now Merin, 21, and Robin, 53, volunteer as a mother-daughter team
at the Companion Hospice in Orange, assisting terminally ill patients
with six months or less to live. Well-intentioned people often ask
how they can hang out with people who are dying. But for Robin and
Merin, it is more like spending time with a friend.
“We only do what we are good at, and I am a good friend,” Robin
said.
They rent videos, call for no reason, buy groceries, cook soup and
tidy up, but, at the end of the day, it is just about being there.
Trust develops, friendship happens, and it really doesn’t matter for
how long. With death lurking in the shadows, there is no wasting
time.
“You may not know this person your whole life, but the things you
share together are things I can’t even talk to my good friends
about,” Merin said.
When Robin started at the hospice a year after her daughter she
discovered an uncanny similarity of interests and personal connection
with her first patient and new friend. Merin seemed fated to help the
same woman. Now they are a kind of tag team -- going in separately,
offering their individual talents and covering one another when
conflicts arise. Their friend loves it.
About 30 years ago, Robin was easing new souls into the world with
natural childbirth. Now she does the same work, easing them back out.
Merin’s experiences have prepared her for a future career in
medicine. Still, it is tough to get that inevitable phone call. “I
cry,” she said.
But by hanging out with people who are dying, Robin and Merin have
learned about living. Merin has gone skydiving, expresses love for
her family and sets bigger goals than she had before her involvement
with Companion Hospice.
“It is important to live hard, work hard and play hard,” Merin
said.
“Yes,” Robin eagerly agreed, “that’s our family motto.”
-- Story and photo by Coral Wilson
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