MAKING IT WORK : Tips for Disabled Singles on Entering Dating Scene

Disabled singles who are reluctant to get out and meet people may be afraid they’ll be pitied by others--or asked questions they’re not ready to answer, says Abilio Hernandez, a Santa Ana psychiatrist.

They also may be struggling with low self-esteem, a common side effect of a disabling injury, adds Hernandez, who specializes in treating injured workers. He offers the following suggestions to help disabled singles put themselves in a frame of mind to pursue an active social life:

* Work on accepting your disability and making the best of what you have. When you’re comfortable with yourself, you make it easier for others to see the best in you.

* Try to use humor to break the ice in new relationships. When you can laugh at your own disability, you know you’ve really accepted yourself.

* Seek professional help if you have become withdrawn and isolated.

* Share your emotional pain with others who are understanding and accepting.

* Don’t allow self-imposed limitations to make you more disabled than you really are.