It’s beginning to look a lot like...

It’s beginning to look a lot like . . . Westwood.

Twinkle lights will henceforth glow year-round in Westwood Village, and the old lamplighter is Councilman Zev Yaroslavsky himself.

The lights, until now entwined seasonally throughout the village’s trees and bushes, will be permanently on display--except for June, when they get disentangled to accommodate tree trimming.

Yaroslavsky promises the illuminations will “add a special touch,” and enhance what he, with rather foot-in-mouth word choice, termed Westwood Village’s “pedestrian ambiance.”

He wuz robbed, he sez.

A second helping of Zev:

A few days after less-than-celebrity candidate Joe Shea filed papers to run for mayor of Los Angeles, and let the press know that his platform calls for 4,000 new police officers. Councilman Yaroslavsky, who is no longer running for mayor, has proposed adding 2,100 officers to the force, with the money coming from the same source--the Community Redevelopment Agency--that Shay declares that he proposed.

It’s no coincidence, says the disgruntled Shay.

“I think a lot of candidates treat ideas like water--it’s everybody’s property. That’s not the case . . . it was my idea . . . we need thousands of new policemen. It’s simply unfair of (Yaroslavsky) to appropriate this idea and make political hay out of it when just weeks ago his own platform never mentioned it.”

As George Bush never said: “Read . . . my . . . mind.”

Alan B. Ungar will swap you, even-steven, 30-30.

On the third Thursday of every month, the Woodland Hills certified financial planner offers 30 minutes of financial advice to people facing layoff, divorce, illness or just rotten luck--in exchange for a fee of “thirtysomething,” meaning thirty-anything.

So far, Ungar has collected donations of 30 apples, 30 rolls of toilet paper and 30 minutes of free hypnotherapy--but not 30 pieces of silver.

Any cash Ungar collects during the sessions is handed over to the anti-war group Beyond War, and the in-kind 30s, from fruit to lav paper, is sent to a shelter for battered women and abused children.

And that, as we say in the newspaper biz, is 30 for that story.

Go figure it.

Wednesday was the 66th annual meeting of the Hospital Council of Southern California, a group of good-health professionals getting together in the land of the fit. And who was the guest speaker at their luncheon?

That poster boy for saturated fats himself, Dodgers manager and legendary trencherman Tommy Lasorda.

A spokeswoman explained that the attendees needed a bit of inspirational entertainment--a touch of lightness, if you will--after a day of serious seminars.

Light? Lasorda?